Making time for what matters

By Rebecca Plant

Darren and Melissa Lewis, Fathering Adventures

“One father is more than 100 school masters.”

This quote by British poet George Herbert is the guiding principle behind the work of Darren and Melissa, who run Fathering Adventures together.

Darren and Melissa Lewis have been married for 25 years, are raising four sons, and have been in business together for a decade.

Fathering Adventures sets out to engage, equip and empower men to forge strong and healthy relationships with their children, and to guide their children safely and confidently into adulthood.

As today’s conversation reveals, their work goes well beyond that by showing people how to live an intentional life that matches their true priorities.

In this episode we chat about:

  • What is Fathering Adventures?
  • The childhood that motivated Darren to support other men.
  • The wound that disrupts 95% of adult relationships.
  • How a child’s relationship with their father impacts their lives.
  • Using experiences to enable dads to reach their children.
  • What about mothers and their relationships with children?
  • Melissa’s evolving experience as a mother of four boys.
  • The role of risk and adventure in parenting boys.
  • Playing the “cheerleader” as a wife and mother.
  • The importance of creating ‘intentional time’ with each child.
  • Why men are wired for adventure and where women/girls fit in.
  • How ‘adventure’ goes beyond merely being outdoors together.
  • What does being intentional mean?
  • The realisation that prompted Darren and Melissa to change their life.
  • The tradition they established to secure time together.
  • Checking that your personal priorities match how you use your time.
  • The true value of time and the danger of regrets.
  • Melissa’s message for busy Couples in Business.  
  • The sacrifices they made to put their family first.
  • Why you must ‘begin with the end in mind’
  • Darren’s advice for breaking the live-to-work cycle.
  • The tough question you must ask yourself to stay on track.
  • The influence of parents during a child’s formative years.
  • What girls and boys learn from watching their father.
  • The impact of “fatherlessness” on children and wives.
  • The rituals and initiations boys need to become men.
  • What couples can do to solidify their union.
  • The simple ritual Darren and Melissa do each day to stay connected.
  • Deliberately carving out time to just be with one another.
  • What Darren and Melissa know now they wished they knew earlier.

Episode resources:

Fathering Adventures:





He’ll Be OK: Growing Gorgeous Boys into Good Men, by Celia Lashlie.

Related podcast episode: The Power of Presence with Dr Dan Hanson


Thank you so much for listening to this episode — we would love to read your comments below. Our goal is to share these valuable insights, information and ideas with as many couples in business as possible. If you enjoyed this episode and know someone else who might too, please share it amongst your network. You can also leave a 5-star review in iTunes, that way we can inspire more people together.

Would you like to be a guest on this podcast? Apply here, we’d love to know more about your story. 


About the Author

Rebecca is the Co-Founder and CEO of The Institute for Couples in Business. Bec is also trusty wife to husband and business partner Ed, and mum to Samuel, 4, and Charles, 2. For the past seven years Bec has been working with business owners, and her Super Powers include making complex problems simple, creating strong connections, and motivating teams by building kick-arse culture. Bec is also author of #1 best-seller Lead-The-Ship and hosts popular podcast Boardrooms & Bedrooms.